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We invite you to join us for a meaningful conversation about the impact family members and family values can have on young Latinx LGBTQ+ people, especially young Latinx trans folks.
Transcript provided by YouTube:
00:08
hello everyone my name is jose soto and
00:10
i work as a digital media manager at hrc
00:14
i am thrilled to be here with all of you
00:16
for this very special conversation
00:17
titled today we’re continuing our latinx
00:21
heritage month celebration by talking to
00:23
two latinx families who understand the
00:25
complexities of being latinx and having
00:28
lgbtq plus family members particularly
00:31
transgender family members i’m thrilled
00:33
to be joined by both the garcia family
00:35
and the vahil family the garcia family
00:38
are joining us from california and laura
00:40
who is elio’s mother volunteers with
00:42
trans family support services which
00:44
provides guidance support advocacy
00:47
coaching and services for transgender
00:49
and gender non-conforming youth and
00:51
their families
00:52
we’re also going to be joined by adeline
00:54
and alamalez vikir from texas adeline’s
00:57
story was recently featured in one of
00:59
our most inspiring impactful videos
01:01
which we’ll be showing later during our
01:03
conversation the video is part of hrc’s
01:05
latin x and proud campaign which is
01:07
created to celebrate and observe latinx
01:09
heritage month
01:10
adam alice is part of our parents for
01:12
transgender equality council and has
01:14
been a strong hrc supporter for quite
01:16
some time let’s bring on alamalis and
01:19
adeline
01:22
hello folks hi
01:24
hi how are you doing
01:26
you’re doing well thank you
01:28
thank you it’s good to see both of you
01:31
it’s good to see you too
01:33
thank you guys for joining us for this
01:35
uh
01:36
meaningful conversation and observance
01:38
of lgbtq
01:41
bladdenex
01:42
conversations in history alemales tell
01:45
us more about how
01:46
identifying as latinx impacts your
01:48
relationship with adeline what is your
01:50
experience like in your household
01:53
understanding it’s mostly latinx um
01:56
comprised right your household yes
01:58
yes um my both my parents and my in-laws
02:02
uh were born and raised in mexico
02:05
we are first generation
02:08
americans
02:13
i think
02:15
the way it helped me
02:17
support adelaine the way it helped me
02:20
um understand her more was because since
02:24
our family is very close-knit
02:27
i think
02:30
experiencing this with her and
02:34
having all the support from our family
02:36
since we’re so so um
02:39
sorry about that
02:42
uh since we’re so uh close and we have
02:45
all most of our family
02:47
very near us practically some living in
02:50
the same neighborhood
02:52
that helped um
02:54
have very strong connection with her and
02:58
kind of helped us um
03:01
kind of helped us um
03:04
you know support each other and
03:07
understand her more and
03:09
it made it easy i want to say we had the
03:14
better piece of the pie i could say
03:17
because oliver family was very
03:19
supportive and since we’re so close and
03:22
united um that means a lot and that
03:24
helped in tremendous ways so
03:27
um
03:29
i think i
03:30
we were one of the lucky ones
03:32
to have uh such supportive latin next
03:36
family
03:37
um which is which made it very easy
03:41
for us to
03:42
kind of let her grow and be herself
03:47
yeah that’s great um i myself come from
03:50
a latinx household and
03:52
the bond and the
03:55
the
03:56
the great connection and chemistry that
03:58
we have as a family definitely helped
04:00
um when it came to me coming out and
04:03
then
04:04
continuing on
04:06
as a family um
04:08
by them being supportive of me and
04:10
acknowledging myself as an individual
04:13
so i
04:14
understand where you’re coming from
04:16
it’s a very
04:18
genuine and very
04:20
uh unique experience to have such a
04:23
great um
04:25
relationship with the family members in
04:26
your household i’m curious adeline what
04:29
about for yourself like what has that
04:31
been like for you um
04:33
since you’re leaving authentically how
04:35
has ha
04:36
having aladdin x uh
04:39
upbringing
04:40
and supportive household uh mean for you
04:44
uh
04:45
like how could i say this like
04:50
what does it mean
04:53
oh it helps it helps me a lot because
04:56
we’re all so close so
04:59
even before i transitioned like
05:01
like i’ve always felt the love and i
05:04
think that’s part of our culture so
05:06
after i transitioned like it was the
05:08
same
05:11
what about your community particularly
05:14
at school how has that
05:16
um
05:17
the area that you live in um i think
05:19
it’s the rio grande valley it’s it’s
05:21
mostly predominantly mexican and mexican
05:24
american so how has it been growing up
05:27
in a predominantly latinx community
05:30
particularly at school have you
05:32
encountered
05:35
significant bullying or has your
05:36
experience been a little bit more
05:37
positive and folks um bring on their
05:40
family values to a school setting they
05:43
like i mentioned there’s predominantly
05:45
mexicans so i’m assuming that a lot of
05:46
folks
05:47
um
05:47
[Music]
05:49
bring on their their family values to
05:51
the school environment um so i’m just
05:53
curious what has that experience been
05:55
like for you
05:56
i think it’s been like
05:58
like bad because
06:01
like
06:03
their beliefs and like um like they go
06:06
home and their parents tell them to
06:08
believe these stuff that they say like
06:10
about me
06:11
so they go back to school and then they
06:14
bully me and they tell me all these
06:15
stuff but just because they heard it
06:16
from their parents
06:18
and i think that has a lot to do with
06:19
like machismo and because of our
06:21
religion
06:24
yeah you bring up a good point um
06:25
machismo is it’s continues to be a
06:28
prevalent issue within the latinx
06:30
community a lot of communities right but
06:32
it’s very noticeable
06:34
um within our community i think it
06:38
it creates barriers um
06:41
of
06:42
of true connection with the people
06:44
around us just because we
06:46
are insisting of things that are so
06:49
dated um and sometimes that impacts our
06:52
relationships that we could be having
06:54
positive relationships that we could be
06:56
having with people
06:57
um whether it be at work or at school we
06:59
just kind of like
07:01
on that mentality um so addressing that
07:04
and you also touched a little bit upon
07:05
religion we’ll be talking a little bit
07:07
more about um
07:09
religion uh religion’s impact on latinx
07:13
uh families and and uh
07:15
communities
07:16
um
07:17
but so you were
07:20
willing to participate in one of our
07:22
hrc’s videos it’s been it’s received
07:25
great feedback and great reception from
07:27
our audiences i want to personally thank
07:29
you on behalf of hrc uh for being
07:32
so giving uh and and willing to share
07:36
your story
07:37
why don’t we go ahead
07:38
and play the video now um
07:41
like i said it’s beautiful it was
07:43
released earlier uh this month at the
07:45
start of latinx heritage month it’s
07:47
titled trans kids need our support 12
07:50
year old adeline shares why um so let’s
07:52
go ahead and watch the video now
08:09
is
08:10
[Music]
08:18
[Music]
08:27
[Music]
08:52
[Music]
09:16
[Music]
09:25
[Music]
09:49
[Music]
10:09
[Music]
10:17
it just sucks at
10:18
that i have to explain to people that
10:20
i’m just normal
10:23
este
10:26
orlando esto los estas
10:30
mi mayor
10:35
[Music]
10:38
is
10:43
[Music]
11:19
[Music]
11:26
negros
11:31
[Music]
11:55
you know i i can’t underscore just how
11:58
amazing that video is and how impactful
12:01
your story is adeline um again thank you
12:03
for sharing your story i think that your
12:05
vulnerability is really where the power
12:08
of this video lies both yours and your
12:10
moms
12:12
i think also some of the reason why it’s
12:14
so insightful and impactful
12:16
is because it’s so relatable even though
12:18
you’re young
12:20
and your experiences
12:21
um that you’re having they’re coming
12:24
like from us from a space of uh an
12:27
understanding of someone um so young
12:30
um
12:31
[Music]
12:32
it it’s so relatable though because
12:34
latinx lgbtq folks share similar stories
12:37
and experience regardless of age
12:39
um you know i see you engaging with your
12:41
mom and your abuela in the kitchen and
12:44
that really drives home the point that
12:46
you make that like hey i’m normal um i’m
12:49
just like any other girl i’m just like
12:50
any other teenager any other youth um
12:54
and that’s very powerful message to
12:55
drive home
12:56
what do you feel when you
12:58
watch this video like um and
13:01
now that it’s been out for a while
13:03
has it and has it empowered you in some
13:06
way or what is your experience it like
13:08
now that your story’s out
13:10
it’s cool because like
13:13
like uh
13:17
i don’t know what to say
13:21
how does it you can just say whatever
13:22
comes to mind and everything you’re like
13:24
like cool like that people now know
13:28
and maybe i it’s also cool that like
13:30
maybe i changed somebody’s
13:32
opinion that makes me feel good inside
13:35
like
13:37
like that i might have changed somebody
13:39
else’s opinion
13:40
and they might have thought negatively
13:42
but after watching my video they could
13:44
really relate to what’s going on to me
13:48
so
13:49
yeah
13:51
yeah i agree i think that’s really cool
13:53
i think you sharing your story
13:55
so authentically and so openly is really
13:58
cool um
14:00
and the power of that is that you’ll be
14:01
changing minds um i’m sure that already
14:04
has happened as we continue pushing the
14:06
video forward um
14:08
during and past latinx heritage month um
14:11
i’m sure a lot of hearts and minds will
14:13
be changed too what about you adeline
14:15
what what um i’m sorry what about you
14:18
adam alice what what do you feel what
14:19
comes to mind when you watch it
14:22
um
14:23
when i watch this video i i
14:26
i
14:27
i tear up every time i watch it
14:30
i feel that
14:32
[Music]
14:33
parents
14:34
can see how
14:37
us
14:38
me as a parent you know as an lgbtq
14:41
parent
14:43
and i am as as fearful as they are um
14:47
as you know
14:49
they that i also need the support that i
14:52
also need the power to protect my child
14:55
and all i want is for my child to have a
14:58
happy and healthy life
15:00
so i hope that they take that in mind
15:02
and i and i also hope that i change at
15:04
least one person’s uh point of view
15:07
and um
15:10
i really hope that um i mean there’s a
15:12
lot of things that
15:14
that that involve adeline’s story that i
15:17
i know that they could
15:19
change at least one mind so knowing that
15:21
there’s they have we have this video to
15:24
kind of share you know and and kind of
15:27
help them understand us better
15:29
it helps me and it gives me peace of
15:32
mind you know that maybe
15:34
we can change it little by little
15:38
yeah um i think you touched upon
15:40
something that’s very important you had
15:42
mentioned that as a parent of an lgbtq
15:45
plus youth you need support and really
15:48
that’s what we also are trying to
15:51
do by sharing um adeline’s story
15:54
is addressing that
15:56
while family is powerful we can get a
15:59
lot of things done through family we’re
16:01
also a community and so we need each
16:04
other to get things uh done to advocate
16:07
for one another and truly create
16:09
experiences
16:11
um
16:12
that are positive for the community but
16:14
for everyone right not just for specific
16:17
individuals um and i think that’s that’s
16:20
yeah
16:20
going going into this going into the
16:23
advocacy world and and trying to speak
16:25
up for my daughter
16:26
i realized how um
16:29
at least in my community in our
16:31
community um
16:33
we lack a lot of representation in the
16:35
latinx
16:36
you know aspect you know there’s not a
16:38
lot of spanish information there’s not a
16:41
lot of
16:42
um
16:44
advocates for for hispanic side and um
16:48
i think we really need to be that voice
16:50
and and bring awareness that hey there’s
16:53
a lot of people in our vladimix
16:55
community that need to speak up and it’s
16:57
not okay to just take
16:59
discrimination and and just go with it
17:02
and
17:03
especially for our youth you know so
17:07
i realized how well going into this i
17:09
realized how little representation we
17:12
have and how we need to
17:13
bring awareness to that too so
17:16
having this video is is
17:18
is very powerful for me so
17:21
thank you for
17:22
that
17:24
of course um i want to welcome the
17:26
garcia family um to join our
17:28
conversation they’re coming in from
17:31
california
17:32
um laura hey guys how are you doing
17:35
hola bienvenidos buenas tardes hola
17:38
hello um
17:40
laura is joining us with her son elio
17:44
who identifies as transgender as well
17:46
laura does volunteer work with
17:48
transgender family support services um i
17:51
had mentioned this earlier but it’s an
17:53
organization that provides guidance
17:55
support advocacy coaching and services
17:58
for transgender and gender nonconforming
18:00
youth and their families uh bienvenidos
18:03
to both of you so good for you to uh be
18:05
joining us so what did you guys think
18:07
about alin’s video and story what what
18:10
thoughts do you guys have
18:11
i’ll start with you lara um every time i
18:15
see that video i start crying
18:17
um and probably i would start crying
18:19
again
18:20
um i think that what um
18:22
adam ali said it just it just gets in
18:24
your heart you know the protection of
18:26
our children we all parents i don’t care
18:29
if you
18:30
um blue green purple we all want the
18:33
same we want our children to be safe we
18:35
want children to be happy
18:37
um so the fact that we have to fight
18:40
for children to be respected
18:43
with the same rights
18:44
and the same
18:46
um
18:47
the same rights in the same respect very
18:50
everybody else it hits really really
18:52
deep um especially in our community we
18:55
know i don’t care if you’re you know
18:57
mexican like me if you cannot tell for
19:00
my accent um
19:06
and uh my son is first generation so we
19:08
have heard it all we know what people
19:10
say about us we’re criminals we’re lazy
19:13
we’re this with that so why we as a
19:17
community are doing that to ourselves
19:20
um it it hits really really deep because
19:24
if anybody knows what it is to be
19:26
treated with less respect that everybody
19:29
that the rest of the people is us
19:31
and for us family is everything
19:35
so um every time i see that video it’s
19:37
just
19:38
it makes me cry
19:41
yeah you bring a good point up of these
19:43
compounding issues of
19:45
being mexican being latinx um
19:50
or from a latinx family and community
19:52
already that presents challenges and
19:54
hardships and then we still have to not
19:56
only defend that aspect of our lives but
20:00
also the aspects of our of our loved
20:02
ones where it’s like they are not only
20:04
um confronting these challenges these
20:07
challenges themselves but they’re also
20:09
having to
20:10
um confront the challenges of
20:12
identifying as lgbtq plus right um so
20:15
it’s kind of like two battles at the
20:17
same time
20:18
elio i want to hear from you what were
20:20
your thoughts when you were seeing the
20:21
video i’m um am i wrong to assume that
20:24
um
20:25
[Music]
20:26
the lean story resonates with you
20:29
oh absolutely it definitely resonates
20:32
and i think that this point of
20:34
representation
20:36
is really what makes this video so
20:37
powerful you know when i was uh coming
20:40
out and exploring my gender identity i
20:43
thought for a long time that there was
20:45
no way i could be transgender because i
20:47
didn’t see anyone like me you know i
20:49
didn’t see anyone that was mexican and
20:51
transgender and so i thought oh well
20:53
there must be no one then so i can’t be
20:56
um and so the fact that this video is
20:59
showing that transgender people are
21:01
everyone
21:02
i think is so important and not only
21:04
that you know there’s this big stigma
21:06
that the transgender community you know
21:08
our deviants and the whole topic about
21:11
transgender people is like this taboo
21:14
topic but in reality it’s not in videos
21:16
like this show that no transgender
21:18
people are people and furthermore
21:20
they’re kids
21:23
and their families and we’re familia and
21:26
um you know i’m citing with this this is
21:28
reason why my family my son and and
21:31
myself we decided to started supporting
21:34
the organization that supported us that
21:36
guided us trent family support services
21:39
was pivotal for my family and for my son
21:42
with the superb groups for children we
21:44
have super groups for um teenagers for
21:48
younger adults for little ones or uh
21:52
client goes from three years old to six
21:54
to three years old and it was important
21:56
for my family to
21:59
help other families it was also
22:01
important for trust family support
22:03
services for them to know there’s
22:05
comunidad
22:07
um it just really you know when i when
22:09
adam ali said that um
22:11
to to know that we’re not alone let me
22:14
tell you we’re not alone there’s a whole
22:17
support behind us by us and the side we
22:21
have uh we have made connections with
22:25
families in mexico central america latin
22:28
america south america espana argentina
22:32
were everywhere and
22:34
i really want to take the opportunity to
22:37
thank hrc because
22:39
we are making presents
22:41
by helping other people cnns like my son
22:45
always says they take a lot of effort
22:48
trying to make us invisible
22:50
we’re not
22:51
we’re here
22:52
we matter
22:55
most definitely most definitely um and i
22:58
love that you touch upon
23:00
the issue of visibility um especially
23:03
for
23:04
lgbtq plus children because i think that
23:08
sometimes as a as a community as a
23:10
latinx community we think of these
23:12
issues sort of like grown-up issues like
23:14
there’s no way that this can exist
23:16
amongst our children um and we we
23:18
definitely need to do a lot a lot more
23:20
work
23:21
in
23:22
bringing visibility to what they are
23:25
experiencing experiencing as latinx
23:27
children
23:28
uh who identify as lgbtq plus
23:31
and
23:32
and provide them with authenticity right
23:34
not just kind of brush it off as a phase
23:37
or something that they’re just confused
23:38
with i think sometimes as latinos and
23:41
latinx folks we
23:43
miss it um so i do thank you for
23:44
touching up on that point because it’s
23:46
very uh important elio you as a as
23:50
you’re in college or you’re you’re
23:52
a bit older than adeline um
23:55
do you think that
23:57
the story
24:00
is still impactful even for folks of
24:02
your age people who identify as lgbtq
24:05
plus uh and latinx but are a bit older
24:08
than natalie do you think that
24:10
those issues stay prevalent even though
24:13
you’re you’re a bit older than adeline
24:15
um what is that experience like of being
24:18
a college age um but seeing that someone
24:21
as young as adeline is is
24:23
um experiencing the issues that you
24:25
might be still experiencing or but
24:27
definitely experienced in the past
24:30
absolutely i think that this issue is
24:32
one that keeps going for you know the
24:34
rest of our lives
24:35
kind of a fight that we continuously
24:37
need to be fighting
24:39
um i think the main difference is that
24:41
you know when you’re
24:43
in
24:44
middle school high school you’re
24:46
counting on the adults in your lives to
24:48
make the correct decisions you know
24:49
you’re counting on your parents your
24:51
teachers to vote the way that
24:54
affirms you
24:55
but once you get into college and you’re
24:57
around voting age you now get to do the
24:59
advocacy yourself and so i think that it
25:02
is something that is very important to
25:04
keep thinking about once you grow up and
25:07
start going to college or enter the
25:08
workforce because you know college isn’t
25:10
for everyone and that’s totally okay
25:12
um but once you get older you are able
25:15
to now be part of the movement you know
25:17
i was able to vote in the 2020 election
25:20
one of the most important elections of
25:23
u.s history for as long as i’ve been
25:25
alive at least and been able to vote um
25:28
so i think these issues definitely carry
25:31
on as you’re older except now you can be
25:34
a part of it
25:37
um i’m curious to know laura and adam
25:40
alice what you guys feel
25:42
when you hear and see your children
25:45
being true
25:46
advocates for lgbtq plus equality what
25:49
is that experience like as
25:51
uh
25:52
mexican latinx mothers
25:58
um
25:58
[Music]
26:00
it is just i cannot even express it um i
26:04
think that um we all have it doesn’t
26:06
really matter in my opinion if you’re
26:08
you know from a small town in mexico a
26:10
small town in south texas
26:12
we have a lot of
26:15
um
26:16
things that we share in our blood you
26:18
know family la sangre espiritu corazon
26:20
comunidad there’s so many things that
26:23
they mean the same for everyone
26:25
and
26:26
i’m very proud of my son not only
26:28
because he had
26:30
that um courage to be himself
26:33
but only not only that but he’s all also
26:36
have the courage and the patience to
26:38
teach me
26:39
there are so many things that i still do
26:41
not know
26:42
there are so many things that i still do
26:44
not understand
26:46
however we have decided
26:48
as a family that we’re here
26:51
to respect each other and more important
26:53
to affirm each other
26:55
because you know my grand
26:57
my grandmother my mother um said you
26:59
know i don’t understand when we had the
27:01
family meeting and my son came out to
27:03
the whole family um she said i don’t
27:05
understand but i will love you forever
27:07
and you’re my son
27:10
however it wasn’t until a year later
27:12
that she started using you know the
27:14
right pronouns
27:15
and now it is fluid como nada
27:23
you know this is elio was always part of
27:26
the family even when he was little
27:29
and i think that that is very important
27:31
because we know as a family and as a
27:33
community that we love each other we
27:35
always love each other but there’s a lot
27:37
of decisions that we take in our
27:40
families and we need to understand are
27:42
they coming for a place to fear are they
27:43
coming from a place to love
27:46
and a lot of the time the intersex you
27:48
know especially for me i’m from a
27:49
generation from a small town with
27:52
religion and everything it was
27:54
everything in my town any anything that
27:57
any
27:58
any big festival any big fiesta it was
28:01
because it has to do something with
28:02
religion so that was another thing that
28:04
i wanted to bring as having a latinate
28:07
um
28:08
chapter kind of um services for trans
28:12
family support services something that
28:14
it would be intersecting with everything
28:16
because we’re not only madres
28:19
we’re abuelas mothers diaz we come with
28:23
a lot of wonderful baggage
28:28
what about you at the malays any
28:29
thoughts
28:31
um
28:34
i feel very proud of my daughter um
28:36
she
28:37
was true to herself from a very very
28:40
young age like i told you uh once um
28:44
since she was three she’s been
28:45
vocalizing it um
28:48
so hearing her advocate for herself now
28:51
and and say yes to any interview and
28:55
speak up for her lgbt community
28:58
um
28:59
it’s very powerful um i was brought up
29:02
um
29:03
kind of you know
29:05
staying
29:06
kind of like um
29:07
in the down low
29:09
don’t mess with the
29:11
politics you know i didn’t know anything
29:14
about politics i didn’t know anything
29:15
about
29:16
things like that and i had to learn now
29:18
because of my daughter and seeing her
29:21
being knowledgeable of all that and
29:23
seeing her
29:24
have the guts at 12 years old to go and
29:27
testify and go and speak up for herself
29:29
and do press conferences and now that it
29:32
it’s very powerful and i i’m so thankful
29:36
that she is so brave and
29:39
i’m learning with her as well but it
29:42
makes me very proud
29:44
to to see
29:45
her it’s not only advocated in english
29:47
but also in spanish it’s it’s very very
29:50
very powerful
29:52
yes claro um and it makes us proud to
29:55
see
29:56
both adeline and elio and a lot of other
29:59
latinx lgbtq plus young advocates push
30:02
for equality uh amongst their
30:04
communities um both of you touched on
30:07
something that i think is
30:09
really important um
30:11
the extension of family and the
30:12
importance of not only finding support
30:16
and inclusivity within your immediate
30:18
family right your your your parents your
30:21
siblings um
30:23
but also among your your grandmothers
30:25
and your grandparents and your diaz
30:28
yourself your abuelos your cousins your
30:30
primos i mean sometimes the dog is even
30:33
important in a lot of next families
30:34
right i mean we are so
30:36
united and and have such a unique bond
30:40
as as latinos and latinx folks that the
30:44
work is it carries on to that you know
30:47
finding support finding love and finding
30:50
inclusivity within your extended family
30:52
is also important and part of that also
30:55
what’s important is religion so i want
30:57
to talk a little bit about religion and
30:58
its impact on
31:00
latinx lgbtq plus families but before we
31:02
get into that conversation
31:04
i want to watch um a video that touches
31:06
on the experience of latinx lgbtq
31:09
families
31:10
entailing religion it’s called before
31:12
god we are all family so let’s go ahead
31:14
and watch now
31:18
[Music]
31:26
we live in a culture where faith and
31:28
family share one symbolic relationship
31:31
but how do you stay truthful to the
31:33
person you were born to be when you’re
31:35
told that who you are is wrong
31:44
because
31:52
my brothers looked at females because
31:54
they wanted to be with the female i
31:56
looked at females more like oh i wish i
31:59
was her
32:00
how do you come out and still maintain a
32:02
close relationship with your family
32:04
with your faith family
32:06
in high school my youngest daughter came
32:09
out to me
32:10
and
32:11
told me she’s lesbian
32:13
and shortly after that a few months
32:15
after that
32:16
my other daughter
32:18
came out that she is lesbian i had my
32:21
first experience with a woman in the
32:23
united states and i was very
32:26
confused and started questioning myself
32:29
i had people that wanted to follow me on
32:30
twitter or that wanted to you know
32:32
friend me on facebook
32:34
and i would really sit and think about
32:35
it because then if if they were friends
32:37
with me on facebook they would see a
32:39
side of my life that not a lot of people
32:41
see and if they see that
32:44
what backlash are my parents going to
32:46
suffer
32:58
[Music]
33:00
who are we to question who god created
33:03
us to be
33:04
who are we to question our capacity for
33:06
love
33:08
[Music]
33:21
a lot of hard-hitting and relatable
33:23
messages and stories in that video right
33:26
um
33:27
having to deal with our families and and
33:30
what how religion plays a part in that
33:32
um lana let’s start with you what what
33:35
does this media make you feel and think
33:36
about um it is very
33:40
very important for my from my family uh
33:44
i was i always said you know to people
33:46
that i’m a recovering catholic like i
33:48
said i come from a very small community
33:50
and um the way that i was brought up it
33:53
was a very constricted and restricted
33:56
religion
33:57
i do believe in god and um this is going
34:00
to make my my son laugh because you know
34:04
packing to college i put the crucifix
34:07
that my grandmother gave me when i came
34:08
to united states by myself
34:11
and then the grandfather gave him the
34:13
rosary that he got
34:15
in um mexico city in the basilica de
34:18
guadalupe so you know we were he was
34:21
having protection coming from all over
34:24
all over the family even though for him
34:27
it doesn’t really mean anything
34:29
but he knows that because it has so many
34:33
deep meanings to us he’s very respectful
34:36
of that
34:37
um he knows that when we go see
34:40
um
34:44
there’s no major protection that that if
34:46
you well i would give you a blessing
34:50
hey well here i come i’m ready
34:53
so having all this and having the
34:55
experience of my son being transgender
34:58
and especially with the families that i
35:00
started supporting through trans family
35:02
support services it was always a point
35:05
of conversation
35:06
you know mitias cristiana no quieramijo
35:10
me abuela no yeah
35:14
there was always something in there
35:16
so there was something that i was not
35:18
able able to understand very deeply and
35:21
i was not able to guide the families
35:23
through it so in my
35:26
continuing quest to look for resources i
35:28
was lucky enough to found this video and
35:31
to find all the resources the hrc has in
35:34
spanish
35:36
and
35:36
you know the different research that
35:38
they have done covering different
35:41
religious
35:43
mormons christians catholic i have not
35:46
been able to find any other information
35:48
anywhere other than nhc
35:50
so this project was very important to me
35:53
because it is important to my community
35:56
it may not be very important for my son
35:58
you know but he took the crux of us
36:01
and he took the rosary
36:03
and grandma gave him all the blessings
36:06
that she could have so he would be safe
36:09
in san francisco
36:12
yeah i will say that you know i’m we i i
36:15
mean it we as latinos and and i myself
36:18
and mexican and come from a mexican
36:19
household
36:21
sorry about that
36:24
sometimes what
36:25
what is meaningful is like the symbolism
36:28
and the tradition behind
36:29
religion and and the importance that it
36:32
has on some of our family members and so
36:35
i take away from
36:36
those
36:37
those meanings as opposed to like
36:40
religion collectively um elia what about
36:42
you what what what are your thoughts
36:44
there
36:45
yeah so i’m not i wouldn’t consider
36:47
myself like a super religious person um
36:50
but my extended family definitely does
36:53
believe in god specifically my
36:55
grandparents
36:56
and so when i was you know coming to
36:58
terms with my gender identity i was
37:00
actually very nervous to tell them
37:02
because religion is one of those things
37:04
that are very personal from person to
37:06
person from religion to religion so one
37:08
person can read one line of scripture
37:10
and think great god wants me to love
37:12
everyone and the other person could read
37:14
the exact same scripture and think great
37:16
i’m going to love everyone except gay
37:18
people because that’s what god says
37:20
because it’s a very personal thing and
37:22
there’s lots of interpretations and lots
37:24
of ways to follow and so you know we
37:26
love to think that love will support
37:29
people that love us will always support
37:30
us but sometimes unfortunately that’s
37:32
not true
37:33
so i was very nervous to tell my
37:35
grandparents
37:36
because of that religion aspect and i
37:38
was very lucky that you know love did
37:40
come out and love did end up like
37:43
winning in terms of that sort of
37:45
struggle with what is more important
37:48
but that’s not the case for a lot of
37:50
people
37:51
um so i was very lucky but i was very
37:53
nervous because of that religious aspect
37:56
i’m sure it’s the case for
37:58
go ahead all right i was just i’m just
38:00
gonna be a mother i was gonna say elio
38:01
you were not lucky my love you were
38:03
blessed
38:05
yeah
38:06
um
38:07
i’m sure it’s it’s it’s
38:09
similar uh experiences and cases with a
38:12
lot of other communities right but
38:14
because religion is so prevalent and so
38:17
um strong within the latinx community
38:20
that
38:21
us who identify as lgbtq it it’s it
38:24
presents some sort of challenges at
38:25
times um and and it does
38:29
at some point make us think of like how
38:32
are we going to
38:33
disclose all this information
38:36
with for a community because you said
38:37
elio you had mentioned that it’s pretty
38:39
personal but
38:41
even though it is it religion is very
38:43
communal right so it’s it’s everywhere
38:45
within our community so um it does
38:47
present a challenge but i agree with you
38:49
in that
38:50
once we get over that hurdle we find
38:52
love um through religion um
38:56
adeline you as a young person this
38:58
conversation might be a little bit um
39:02
not
39:03
your thing to talk about right but like
39:05
what are your thoughts there how do you
39:07
feel about
39:08
religion and whether that helps you or
39:10
does it present different challenges to
39:11
you as a young
39:13
trans kid
39:15
it definitely presents challenges
39:17
because
39:19
growing up i was always very religious
39:22
and i was always with my grandmother so
39:24
she was very religious
39:26
and then when i kind of came to knowing
39:28
myself and being my true self
39:31
i kind of distanced myself from religion
39:33
because
39:34
like the way that they would talk about
39:36
people uh people from the lgbtq
39:38
community
39:39
it made me realize that if i were to
39:41
come out
39:43
i would get hated on or i would i could
39:46
like
39:47
i could get bullied from like people
39:50
preaching the word of god or
39:52
so it made me distance myself from
39:54
religion and i still believe in god and
39:56
stuff but
39:58
i just practice like on my own now
40:00
because
40:01
i i am too scared to to like go to
40:04
church
40:06
yeah and i think so that’s something
40:08
that a lot of lgbtq plus latinx folks
40:12
experience um personally i have a very
40:14
similar story and had to kind of
40:16
distance myself
40:18
significantly from from the church and
40:21
and
40:22
um
40:23
its importance in in my upbringing um
40:27
so yeah you’re not alone in that
40:28
experience
40:30
um but what about what it it helps folks
40:34
with because i i know that through
40:36
religion and through um her belief in
40:39
god my mom was really able to
40:42
um
40:43
become supportive and accepting and
40:45
inclusive of my identity very quickly
40:48
because it was like well god teaches us
40:50
to love and because of this principle
40:53
we’re not going to create different
40:55
challenges for you it is what it is and
40:57
we’re we’re going to love you no matter
40:59
what do folks feel like that is also the
41:01
case within your families does religion
41:04
help you
41:05
um
41:07
find love and acceptance a bit quicker
41:09
it facilitates that experience because
41:11
of our religious upbringings
41:15
i feel i feel like i i kind of want to
41:19
shadow elio’s point of view there
41:21
because since it’s very it can be uh
41:26
taken very very different ways you know
41:28
i i think it depends on how
41:31
the the family or the person wants to
41:34
take the word of god or the religion and
41:37
say hey god is love and
41:39
we’re gonna love you no matter what
41:41
which is kind of what our family did
41:44
but not everybody has that you know
41:47
experience so we were like i said the
41:49
the
41:50
one of the blessed ones uh
41:53
that we had family that that uh took it
41:56
that way but like elio said it it’s all
41:59
on how they want to
42:02
perceive it and how they want to see it
42:04
so um
42:05
i think that has a lot to do with how
42:08
your family and and or your community is
42:11
going to take it
42:12
um
42:13
that’s a very strong point eliot made
42:20
lara did you have anything to add to
42:21
that
42:22
um in my family it was you know because
42:24
we’re on recovery catholics um i think
42:27
that we use we chose to use
42:31
the word of god to be respectful of my
42:35
son’s true identity
42:38
i think also that that helped a lot
42:40
faith help a lot especially my mother
42:42
when she was going through all the
42:44
process of grieving
42:46
of accepting of you know like off
42:50
we all have our own way
42:53
to accept
42:54
uh my son’s jewelry through reality and
42:58
i think that for my mother especially it
43:00
was very very helpful to be able to have
43:03
her fate
43:04
because at the end she always says you
43:06
know god does not make mistakes
43:09
and
43:09
my child is smart
43:12
he is great
43:15
i’m just you know like adeline
43:18
we have beautiful beautiful beautiful
43:21
children they’re changing the world that
43:24
they truly themselves and they have more
43:26
courage than the little pinky that i
43:28
will ever have in my whole life
43:30
so we you know we just follow the lead
43:32
and
43:33
we pray for their safety and we are just
43:37
so lucky and so blessed that we’re in
43:38
california when we have so many laws in
43:41
schools when we have so many laws and
43:44
businesses and the state government
43:47
really
43:48
makes a point of having
43:50
equality
43:52
rights for everyone
43:55
you know you touch on something that’s
43:56
that’s very important not only
43:59
during latinx heritage month
44:01
particularly for latinx lgbtq plus folks
44:04
but all year round is
44:07
equal protections legal protections for
44:09
lgbtq plus people not only latinx lgbtq
44:13
plus people but everyone um and that’s
44:15
to include
44:17
um
44:18
marginalized communities and um
44:22
communities of color
44:24
and that
44:25
leads us to the conversation of the
44:27
equality act the passing of the equality
44:29
act would guarantee legal protections
44:33
not just for people like us um
44:36
but other individuals that are part of
44:38
our community not only lgbtq plus
44:41
community but
44:42
people of color bipoc people transgender
44:44
folks um women right and so i i
44:49
want to end the conversation
44:51
on the importance
44:53
of addressing and advocating for the
44:56
equality act during latinx heritage
44:58
month particularly through a queer
45:00
latinx lens but beyond that right and so
45:03
elio you had
45:05
talked about um voting in a very
45:08
significant presidential election
45:10
and so
45:13
on the topic of the equality act what
45:14
are your thoughts there and
45:17
as an advocate
45:19
what do you see
45:20
happening with the equality act and how
45:23
would it um provide protections for
45:25
lgbtq plus latinx folks
45:28
absolutely so um like mentioned before
45:31
you know i do live in california and i’m
45:33
going to university
45:34
in san francisco and i was able to vote
45:38
you know in the 2020 election and then
45:40
recently um last month in the
45:43
governor govern recall
45:46
sorry i forgot how to say that word
45:48
um but essentially with the equality act
45:51
we would get a lot of the same
45:52
protections you know in texas that we
45:54
are seeing in other states like
45:56
california for example my school we have
45:59
gender neutral restrooms in every
46:01
building on campus
46:03
so you know
46:04
even if a transgender person were to
46:06
exist outside of the gender binary of
46:08
you know trans women or trans man would
46:11
still have a place to be able to feel
46:13
comfortable and use the restroom
46:17
furthermore you know i was born in texas
46:19
laredo texas and while it was super easy
46:22
here in california because of those
46:24
protections to be able to change you
46:25
know my legal name and my gender marker
46:28
on my id because my birth certificate is
46:30
from texas that’s going to be a lot more
46:33
difficult to change and without the
46:34
equality act will probably i’ll probably
46:36
never have a birth certificate that
46:39
correctly you know reflects who i am and
46:41
my gender identity
46:43
um
46:44
the most important thing here is that
46:45
you know texas is a beautiful state
46:47
there are beautiful people in texas and
46:49
so with the equality act will really be
46:51
able to help support and protect these
46:53
people
46:57
ellen in your video you mentioned the
46:58
importance of the equality act because
47:01
um of things that you’ve experienced at
47:03
school um and also you you include your
47:07
experiences with having asthma and
47:09
whether that would um
47:11
a conflict if you were to god forbid
47:14
right um end up
47:15
in need of medical care so as a young as
47:19
a very young lgbtq plus latinx
47:22
individual
47:23
how do you see yourself continuing to
47:26
advocate for the passing of the equality
47:28
app
47:31
i don’t get like i don’t get that
47:33
question
47:34
like yeah like as you continue to grow
47:37
and share your story
47:39
do you want to continue advocating for
47:41
the passing of the equality act oh yes a
47:44
hundred percent because
47:46
uh not only would i benefit from it but
47:49
everybody in the united states would
47:51
benefit from it and texas in texas
47:55
i mean it wouldn’t just create
47:57
applying
47:58
oh
48:00
it’s for everyone right um well not
48:02
everyone but folks that are actually
48:03
because right now
48:04
you could you could drive from texas to
48:07
another state and your rights would
48:09
change
48:10
uh drastically and so yeah you’re right
48:13
it would create uh provide protections
48:15
for
48:16
um
48:17
people within our community um
48:20
do you have anything to add on to that
48:23
um i would like to add that another
48:26
advantage also that um protection
48:29
um you know not only for transgender for
48:33
gender diverse relaxing bipod
48:37
this this year has been very difficult
48:39
we have seen the best of humanity we
48:41
have seen the worst of humanity so by
48:44
having um
48:45
loss is actually very important because
48:47
they’re not only protecting the people
48:49
that is affected by those laws but it
48:52
also allows the education of other
48:54
people
48:55
um
48:56
because we have the laws that we have in
48:57
california trans family support services
49:00
actually goes to schools
49:02
and educates teachers and staff
49:06
they go to hospitals we work with
49:09
different medical services because
49:12
we also want them to be able to support
49:15
respect
49:17
and affirm
49:19
gender diverse people we go to
49:22
businesses you know if somebody is not
49:25
only because there may be somebody that
49:27
is gender diverse at their business but
49:29
it’s just because some business in
49:31
california they’re very open to
49:33
educating themselves because when we
49:36
know better we do better
49:38
so um having laws that are actually
49:40
changing is not only changing to
49:42
protection but also changing with
49:44
education and with education they’re
49:47
nothing but progress
49:48
always
49:51
indeed indeed
49:53
um
49:54
great folks well i just want to thank
49:56
you guys each of you for
49:58
joining me
50:00
and contributing to such an amazing and
50:03
meaningful conversation
50:05
um
50:06
and to helping me
50:08
address and shine light spotlight the
50:10
issues that lgbtq plus latinx folks like
50:14
ourselves face
50:15
their challenges ahead of us but as long
50:18
as we stick together and advocate for
50:20
what we know is right i think that we
50:21
have a bright future ahead of us
50:24
thank you also for helping me celebrate
50:26
and observe latinx heritage month um a
50:29
very happy ladder next heritage month to
50:30
each of you um and again just thank you
50:33
so much for your time it’s it’s it’s
50:34
been uh fun it’s been great
50:37
thank you thank you thank you
50:41
bye
—
This post was previously published on YouTube.
***
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The post Toda La Familia: A Discussion About Trans Inclusion in Latinx Families and Communities [Video] appeared first on The Good Men Project.